Mothers Day
For the first few weeks, when I even thought about my pregnancy, labor, delivery and events that followed or how much I loved Maisie…I would burst into tears. The above photo was no exception. Being a mom means loving someone so much, it actually hurts.
When you become someone’s mom, you instantly understand why she worried so much. Why she cared so much. Why she cried when you hurt yourself, or worse.. when you hurt someone else. Why she missed you when you flew away on airplanes to chase dreams on cruise ships. Why she was proud. Why she laughed at your lame jokes, why she bragged about your ‘sports award’ in grade 4, and why she was so upset when you died your hair, got tattoos, crashed cars, drank too much, acted wildly. You immediately understand why it hurt so much when you told her “I hate you, I wish you weren’t my mom” when you were little (or not so little).
Everything makes sense. You wish you maybe had realized what being a mom to someone really meant a whole lot sooner, and maybe could have been a bit easier on your own mom along the way. You may have hugged her more and been more patient. You might think about the years of her life she gave up, so you could be a healthy, loving, kind human being. You may think about how her body would never be the same, all because she wanted to give you life. You may even think about her sleepless nights feeding you, loving you, singing and rocking you back to sleep. You might think about what she sacrificed, now that you’ve made some of the same sacrifices. You may understand that she really doesn’t want anything in the world more, than for you to have the most magic life you could ever imagine. You may feel like mothers day is not just another day. It may be a reminder for you to take a moment and do some thinking, and remembering and honoring.
I’m not sure if its the same for everyone. But for me, this little being has rocked the very core of my being into remembering that I didn’t just magically appear here on earth.
My mom brought me here. Aches, pains, labor, delivery, growth charts, doctors visits, sleepless nights. She made me. Raised me. Taught me to see beauty, everywhere. Infused my soul with a deep appreciation for life, for love and instilled the most important trait of all in me… compassion. I didn’t just magically arrive here. In fact, I’m pretty sure without her… I would have never even existed. All of this means a whole lot more now that I look over and see my own little girl sleeping soundly, sweetly. In fact, everything means more now.
Mom, I love you. I understand what you went through to create me, I am forever grateful.
Tags: erin wallis, mothers day, Photo blog, photography, photography blog
May 7th, 2010 at 7:33 am
Yet another beautiful post! I can only imagine what an amazing mother you must have
and what an amazing Mother you are! Each year has its new challenges and of course amazing moments as I learn everyday myself with our girls and yes Layla gets upset when I call her my Baby but alas I will never stop no matter how mad she gets cause it is true she is my Baby FOREVER! Haha
Have an amazing Mothers Day you deserve it!!
May 7th, 2010 at 10:44 am
All of these things that you write about and feel are all the things that you can not read about in a “What to Expect When Your Expecting Book” These are all the things that you want tell the world about, to tell expecting mothers about. How PROUD you are (I am) to be a not only a parent but a mother! Tonight, I watched my great friend bring a baby into this world. It was and always will be a magically thing! I would never change my path in life for anything. Happy Mothers Day!
May 7th, 2010 at 11:04 am
…… “here’s a penny for your thoughts a quarter for the call and all of your Momma’s love” I am the luckiest Mom in ” the whole tired world” I love you forever & for always xo
May 7th, 2010 at 11:58 pm
You pretty much summed it up Erin. Brought tears to my eyes….I love my mom and what could be better than getting to be a mom!
May 8th, 2010 at 5:13 am
How do you spell…Ihavethemost amazingextendedfamilyanyonecoulddreamof…..????? Happy mother’s day Erin!!!!
May 8th, 2010 at 8:27 am
Erin ~ You are such a beautiful spirit! Your blog brings me to tears… Happy Mothers Day~
May 8th, 2010 at 7:39 pm
As usual your words are as beautiful as your photos. Im not a mother, so I have yet to experience what you are talking about. But your words bring tears to my eyes…. again. You are such an amazing person and your words and photos open my eyes to thing I cant imagine. So, for that, I thank you
May 26th, 2010 at 12:10 am
Dearest Erin, you’re words bring to the forefront all the memories, both great and not-so-great, of changing seasons with my own mom. Many of us share your same sentiments, yet are unable to so eliquently put them into words. Thank you. Your talent, love, spirit and dedication are a blessing to so many. Congratulations to you and Bryce on the birth of your beautiful Maisie Lu. xoxo
June 3rd, 2010 at 6:16 am
Erin – I came across your blog today by chance. And tears came to my eyes within the first 30 seconds. You’re not only a gift photographer, but a gifted writer. xoxo Chantale
April 21st, 2011 at 6:32 am
[...] day as a mom. Even when I write that, I choke up. It gets you. Having babies just changes you. I wrote about it last year HERE. I can’t wait to celebrate mothers day with YOU fabulous [...]